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Professional Detachment in Leadership and Communication

Reza Hossein Borr

Your tolerance determines the level of your professionalism. Your tolerance also determines the stability of your mood and your mental state when least desirable actions happen. Professional detachment is required because people are susceptible to anger and frustration when they are not required to happen. People get angry when their expectations of a good thing from an event are not delivered. If people learn that what ever happens they will take the best advantage, then they will be less affected by what happens. Anger happens when people think there was something that could have been avoided but it was not avoided because somebody was foolish. If people think that anger happens because of lack of professional detachment, it will raise a big question about their professionalism.

Professional detachment means mastering some psychological techniques that detach the person from his emotions during carrying out a project. It is about getting a new attitude towards what happens regardless of its intensity. This may be called insensitivity but in fact insensitivity is different from being professionally detached. Professional detachment is about looking at the events from a reasonable distance without being involved directly into action or taking what happens outside as a personal matter. Setting yourself away from the events and observing them as an observer while they happen prevent uncontrolled emotions in your appearance.

Since what you feel appears in your face and your voice and body movements, it is important to prepare yourself before getting involved in what it may become a painful event or a controversial statement. When your voice started trembling and your body started shaking or the colour of your face started changing, you are affected deeply and what you do is far from professionalism. Nobody wants to get out of control. It is the reason that professional detachment has been developed to prevent embarrassment and uncalculated actions. Keeping in mind that it does not take a long time before a person is provoked into instant radical reactions, preventative actions are difficult to make once the trigger is performed. What happens after that is about damage control. Damage is already done badly but could be controlled if the person has learnt some strategies for cooling down himself immediately.

The best strategy for remaining calm and cool in tough times or in expected or unexpected tough events is developing sufficient resources and human qualities to increase tolerance to a high-level. Tolerance is not something that could be mastered very quickly because you want to have it. Tolerance must be gradually learnt step-by-step and tested. It is not something that cannot be not achieved. But it is something that needs to be rehearsed, practically under supervision, possibly in the real world. There are many strategies and techniques that can prevent frustration and anger. Whatever actions trigger the emergence of unwanted feelings and emotions, this belief must be developed that it is possible to change negative states and foster positive states.

Different mental states are the products of the unconscious system. Unconscious system can be trained to avoid the production of painful emotions. Pain is the result of emotional attachment when it is triggered negatively. Happiness is also the result of emotional attachment when it is triggered positively. Pain comes when negative emotions get attached to one particular incident and they come out without control if the incident is attached to a series of incidents. Happiness is the result of positive emotional attachment when they are triggered by positive incidents attached to each other. Happiness continues if the number of positive incidents increase and get chained together.

Emotional people necessarily will get either upset or happy quickly. The distance between pain and happiness is a short distance in the line of human emotions in people whose states become painful or joyful instantly. The numbers of things that happen and are neutral are very small for them. The absolute majority of the issues, incidents, talks and thoughts fall in one of the negative or positive category and trigger either painful or joyful emotions.

If the distance between the point of pain and point of happiness is very short, the person becomes moody and swings quickly from pain to happiness and sometime stops happiness from happening when pain takes over his whole body very quickly. Once negative emotions of pain took over the body, it is very difficult to generate the feeling of happiness. The body becomes the source of production of destructive chemicals that poison the body and it takes a long time before the poison moves out of the system.

When the distance between pain and joy is very long, the tolerance for experiencing painful and joyful events become more and the people do not get into swinging emotions. They show patience and remain cool. Emotions must enjoy stability of movement and not sudden or saddened upsurge if tolerance and coolness are to be achieved and integrated into unconscious mind.

Nothing generates more respect for you when you remain cool while everybody expects you to become irritated.

Reza Hossein Borr is an NLP Master Trainer and a leadership consultant and the creator of 150 CDs and 14 Change management models. He is also the author of Manual Success, Manual of Coaching and Mentoring, Motivational Stories that Can Change Your Life, and a New Vision for the Islamic World. He can be contacted by email: sarawani@aol.com http://www.rezaaa.com

About the Author

Reza Hossein Borr is a leadership consultant and the creator of 150 CDs and 14 Change management models. He is also the author of Manual Success, Manual of Coaching and Mentoring, Motivational Stories that Can Change Your Life, and a New Vision for the Islamic World. He can be contacted by email: sarawani@aol.com

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